When the kids came home from school today, I was already fully aware that it was going to be a whine-filled “this is all your fault” kind of day. It’s been raining, heavily, for days. Weather has been yo-yoing. One has end of the year testing going on, and the fact that they can’t go outside and let off some steam suddenly becomes my fault, because I am mommy, and apparently I control the universe.
I appreciate that my kids think I’m some all-knowing, all-powerful being, capable of impossible feats and miraculous acts, but… I’m not. I’m human. Moms are humans. Still, for some reason unknown to me, they think we can do it all. And they get REALLY pissed when we say that we can’t.
Welcome to parenthood, where everything’s your fault!
Here are just a few of the things our kids think we should be able to do, and blame us for their displeasure when we can’t.
This whole know-all, see-all, do-all without knowing anything, seeing anything, or doing anything, is exhausting.
Frying pans. Who knew, right? pic.twitter.com/usSQcFGpmI
Just did this yesterday and it was everything 9 year old me could have dreamed of pic.twitter.com/imYQlUmSVn
LIVE on Twitch tonight -- come say hi! twitch.tv/holdinholden
As I embark on an 11 day trip with my kids, this is especially fitting. VACATIONS WITH KIDS ARE MANUAL LABOR! holdinholden.com/2016/03/vaca…
Are you, though?? 😂😂 pic.twitter.com/Rm5L9PBuiL
When I file for divorce and people ask why I'm gonna say "I told him I felt bloated & wanted donuts and he replied 'that's not gonna help'"
Me usually: Lunch time, kids! So much to choose from! Me before a trip: You're gettin' a bread sandwich because I'm not going shopping again
How to Convince Your Fam to Watch ANYTHING you want on Netflix! goo.gl/fb/H6iZrR
We're just... uh.... wrestling.... 😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/dpAIyM88c8