The Two Reactions Moms Have to Cancelled Plans

Since I’ve had kids, my reaction to cancelled plans can usually be summed up in one word. An exclamation, really. A feeling. an overabundance of joy summed up by 3 letters:


There was really no greater feeling than knowing you don’t have to prepare not only yourself, but your kids, to go out for some things you really didn’t want to do all that much anyway. People say the older you get, the more excited you get about cancelled plans, but I don’t think it’s age. I think it’s preferring lazing about rather than trying to corral your insane children in public. It’s not having to get them ready, think about what they need, what you need, what everyone needs. Being on time. Worrying about someone having to potty. Trying to FIND a potty. Worrying about snacks and drinks and blah blah fucking blah, the bajillion things you worry about as a parent when you’re not in the comfort of your own home. You’d just rather stay in the comfort of your own home, am I right?

No having to put on pants, or makeup, or brush your hair. No having to pick out clothes for the kids or keeping them from getting food or boogers on them. No having to have patience because there are witnesses present. You can just be you. And not even the best version of you. The grossest, laziest version of you. You can pick your nose, couch surf, eat an entire bag of chips. None of these things you could do if other people were around.

Well, okay, technically that’s not true. You COULD do all of these things, but they’re likely to get you some weird looks and possibly a few phone calls.

It’s not that I hate leaving the house. I’m not a hermit, or agoraphobic. I do things all the time. I enjoy things outside the 4 walls of my house. Hell, my house can drive me crazy from time to time, but more often than not, I just prefer the relaxation in knowing that I don’t have to do anything. That I have no obligations other than to keep everyone in this house alive. SO, when I get that phone call telling me I can do exactly what I like to do most days- which is nothing- I breathe a sigh of relief.


One less fight to have that day.

I was wrong in my line of thinking that had me believing ALL the best plans were cancelled plans, because this morning, after I’d been waiting weeks to get my hair done, I got a message from my hair stylist informing me she was sick and would need to reschedule my appointment.

Gut bomb.

Hair appointments are my ME time. My time to get away from life. To just sit and do nothing but gossip and read trashy magazines and NOT listen to my kids bitching about everything. It’s one of the only plans I make I actually look forward to, and when they get cancelled, it’s awful. It’s horrible. I then find myself sitting on the couch vegging out, which any other day I would relish every moment of, feeling angry and sad.

My life can really be summed up in two reactions.

Plans that I don’t want to have that get cancelled:








Plans that I WANTED to keep because they got me the hell away from my kids for a little while and LAWD KNOWS I need the me time:






There is no in between.

Does anyone else feel this way??

Posted on February 10, 2017 by Holdin' Holden 2 Comments
Holdin' Holden

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  • Uhh, 100%!!!! Here I was thinking I was the only one feeling like this!! Yes! I am so dang guilty about it because I “should” want to make every freaking playdate and birthday party and yadda yadda … but it is so freaking exhausting to go everywhere all the time! i have 2 daughters, 1 and 3, and they could be cats I’m herding for all I know. It’s so much easier to stay home and play with our toys, 10ft from our toilet and 1 room away from the snacks/milk/water they need (and the coffeepot).

    I’ve literally started saying “no” to almost every birthday party invitation we get because it is just getting to be too much. Very close friends only, please!

  • Yup, this is exactly how I feel about plans. Also, the relief at not having to think of small talk once we’re doing “the plans” is immense.