**This giveaway has ended. Thanks to all who entered!
WHY do I love Netflix sooooo much? Well. I will tell you. And then I’ll give you a chance to win a Netflix gift card, since I’m in the giving spirit and all.
12. Netflix doesn’t judge. Netflix understands my desire not to wear pants or leave the house for the entire day. Or two. Netflix is totally okay if you sit around looking like crap binge-watching. Netflix is the lazy enabler you always wanted!
11. HASHBROWN! Pinot Noir! Creeping Mother of Christ. Bitches gots to learn. Kimmy Schmidt. Olivia Godfrey. Piper Chapman. There’s really nothing better than the characters in Netflix’s original series and the things that come out of their mouths.
10. Sanity. When the kids are making me CRAZY and there is nothing on the boob tube, they can always find something on Netflix to watch, giving me 5 consecutive minutes to sweep the floor. Have a cup of coffee. Pee in peace. The important stuff.
9. Throwbacks! Helping me prove to my kids that my childhood was way more awesome than theirs, Netflix brought back Carebears and Popples, as well as streaming The Magic Schoolbus,Goosebumps, and other goodies from the “olden days”. In yo face, suckas!
8. “Keep Watching”- even though Netflix enables my inner laziness, it also likes to at least give me a chance to have a life. Nope.
7. NO COMMERCIALS. As much as I enjoy hearing Lowell “The Hammer” Stanley scream at me…. yeah, no. I don’t enjoy that at all (if you don’t know who he is, consider yourself lucky. Or look him up on Youtube, but don’t say I didn’t warn you!) Or any other commercial.
6. Re-boots! I’m sure we all said a collected “Have mercy!” when Netflix announced their reboot of Full House (aptly named Fuller House) but I nearly peed when I heard they were resurrecting Gilmore Girls. Still trying to convince them to send me to the set. OH PLEASE OH PLEASE! DO IT! I WILL ONLY EMBARRASS YOU A LITTLE!
5. Finale Fatigue- Why does all TV programming end at the same time? WHY DID YOU PLAY ME LIKE THAT, CABLE? This is the moment I need Netflix the most. As I mourn the most recent finale that will leave me alone for months and months to
forget important plot points wonder, I can get lost in something new on Netflix, because there is ALWAYS something new (even if it’s old).
4. “I can’t, I’m Netflixing”- It’s a valid excuse for just about everything.
3. “Would you like to play a game?”- the infamous words of Jigsaw, who I swear is just Netflix wearing a mask. You didn’t know Netflix has games?? Oh, they do. My favorite is “watch the low-rated movie to see if people are on crack or you just wasted two hours of your life!” I’ve found some of my favorite movies this way. I’ve also cursed the stars in the sky for making such horrible cinema, and then laughed a lot, because Netflix got me good. Try it some time! it will definitely entertain you on a boring night.
2. There is literally something for everyone. Whether you like to enjoy the classics, movies released in the past year, or if you’re like me and enjoy torturing your children with Shrek on Broadway, Netflix is the place for you.
1. “Netflix and chill” makes me laugh. If someone asked me to “Netflix and chill” and then tried to get me to do anything OTHER than actually watch Netflix and chill, I’d be pissed. Get that handsy crap outta here, I have shows to binge!
Extra credit Netflix awesomeness: I am now giving away a six month membership to Netflix to one lucky reader! BAM! MERRY NETFLIX, PEOPLE!
Every. Single. Time. pic.twitter.com/aAAWWjdrN3
I'm either "I HAVE 3 FRIES LEFT DON'T TOUCH MY PLATE!" or "Please take this so I can't eat any more of it!" There is no in-between.
Dear people writing articles on ways to get siblings to get along, I'll save you the time. The answer is "Don't let them play together"
Please stop Complimenting my kids’ “Good” Behavior goo.gl/fb/rwfojS
Hard pass from me pic.twitter.com/VayvW1eopK
I've gotten to the point where I'd let my kids summon a demon with a Ouija board before I'd let them play Monopoly together again.