“Wait… How old are you?” I answer with whatever age I am, and I hear the same thing all the time- “Wow, you had kids young!”
My reaction is always the same- “Yeah…. so?”
My first kid dropped from my lady parts when I was 23. This shocks some people; it definitely shocked my Dad who famously followed his congratulations with “Well, we wish you would have waited.” Thanks, Dad.
It’s a common line of thought that if you have kids when you’re still young (and that perception of youngness differs from person to person), you’ve wasted your youth- your LIFE, even. All that time you could have been out learning who you are, what you want out of life, what direction you want it to go in. That time when you’re still discovering the world and all it has to offer, the FREEDOM- and I spent it having babies. The horror!
“Having kids in your twenties sounds a lot like leaving the party before 10pm.”
Should I have waited until later in life? Do I regret not waiting? Inquiring minds always seem to want to know- and I applaud the inquiring minds. Having children is a BIG decision. It’s one that you make and you can’t take back for the rest of your life. It’s a hell of a lot more permanent than a tattoo. It’s a decision I guess a lot of people think that no one is really “ready” to make until they’re a little older with more experience under their belt. When they’ve weighed the outcomes, the possible consequences, and the financial burden that comes with creating another life and just how much responsibility it is. There are an OVERWHELMING amount of things to think about it when you sit down and try to plan your life plus children.
Of course I thought about the money. I thought about insurance, and whether or not I would be a working mom or a stay at home mom. I thought about health and wellness and doctors and just how much my body would look like a stretched out beachball. I thought about futures with Santa-filled Christmas mornings, and birthday parties with pinatas, and the return of homework via my child. I thought about the fact that I don’t really even like children all that much, and worried that maybe I couldn’t stretch my love far enough to care for someone completely- from head washing to butt wiping. I thought about germs and diapers and baby-proofing and I even thought a little bit about the effect a child would have on my social life. The one thing I DIDN’T think about? My age.
When it comes down to it- parenthood isn’t about being “ready”- Oh lord, that’s hysterical! You’re NEVER ready. It’s not about being too young or too old or how many books you’ve read or how many countries you’ve traveled to.
So what do I think? Did I waste my youth? Was I TOO YOUNG when I started having kids? Are YOU?
I think that if YOU think having children is a waste of your youth… well, you’ve already answered the question for me.
You wouldn't sniff a stranger's butt to see who pooped their pants.... so you probably shouldn't do these other parental things to strangers, either. holdinholden.com/2017/12/weir…
Weird Things you do for your kids but not Strangers goo.gl/fb/oVuwvG
Tis the season! pic.twitter.com/5VgMLnt22E
I am weak pic.twitter.com/LYdRQ6EZcC
You know that feeling when you don't chew a chip all the way and it cuts you all the way down and you swear it's gonna kill you, but you go ahead have another right after? That's what it's like when you decide to have another kid.