Separation Anxiety- Mommy Needs Some SPACE!

Sometimes, when I leave the room, the kids act as if it’s the LAST time they will ever see me. They scream, they hold one hand in the air reaching toward me , and the other across their heart, as if to say, “No! Please, don’t go! I promise, I’ll be good! I’m sorry for what I did/said! I can’t go on without you!”

I swear, it’s like a heart wrenching goodbye scene right out of a Hollywood blockbuster.  And frankly, I’m done.  Let me eat, take a shower, pee, drink my coffee for Pete’s sake!! PLEASE, I am on my knees, begging you to STOP crying!  MOMMY NEEDS TO BREATHE!

It’s times like these (see below) when I ask myself, “is it worth it?”


1.Dude, I need to pee,  I don’t have the luxury of diapers like you do,
just give me a minute, would ya?

But NOOOOO, as soon as  I think I’m a safe distance away (not far
enough to not hear their sobbing voices), I see those little fingers
reaching under the bathroom door, as if to say, “I’ll never let go,
Jack, err, uhh, Mom!”
Here’s the thing, Rose lets go in Titanic, and so will I,  get over it.

I fear for the day that they learn how to open doors.


2. How about when I need coffee… and I NEED coffee. As soon as I exit their line of sight, they wail  like Tom Hanks in Cast Away when he loses Wilson, “Mom, I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry Wilson-Mom!”
Look kid, you need me to need this cup of goodness. I promise you that, and what are you so sorry for?  I better make it a double.

Is it nap time yet?!


3. My favorite is when I leave the room to get something FOR them.

Lunch time, OK, I’ll go get some food going. This is when the hangry (when you are so hungry that you become angry with everyone and everything around you) screams come out.  The second I leave their area, they start shouting, at me like I’m Anty in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids, “Go on! I don’t need you! Go on! Get out of here!”  This shout leaves me confused, I want to comfort them, and yet they terrify me.  So, so much.

Sometimes, I just want to toss food at them and yell, “EAT YOUR FOOD, TINA!”
(And truth be told: I’ve done it, more than once.)

4. And the moment when you stand up after playing peek-a-boo who knows HOW long on the hard floor, and they break down into sobs equivalent to Grace saying goodbye to Harry in Armageddon, “No, Mommy, no, please, no, don’t go!”
Small-Child, Mommy can’t sit down here on the hard floor a minute longer, remember when she BROKE HER BUTT when YOU were born? Yeah, I’m not letting up on that one just yet, I’m still quite bitter.  PLUS, I’m 2 inches away, chill out!

Broken. Buttbone.  ‘Nuff said.


5. The sneak attack always gets me.
Every. Single. Time.

This is when you leave them, and not only do they scream, but they FOLLOW you, like the little zombie/monster that they are. All the while, screaming, “BRAINS! Or bottle, that’s cool too, but BRAINS!”  And they they claw at you until you give in.

I have only been depantsed  by a zombie-baby twice this year, which is progress, and have possibly learned my lesson.

(Don’t leave a screaming zombie-baby that is fully mobile. They WILL crawl after you and yank on your pants until your pants come down exposing you to your unsuspecting neighbor walking his dog  until pick her up and wipe the snot and tears away— like I said, only twice this year. Not bad, right?)

What did I take away from this? I learned to wear sweatpants with ties… and actually TIE them.
And to feed them brains.

I wish I could reassure them that I will return in a way that they would understand, and actually believe.  But until that day, I will do my best to carry on. Perhaps, I should dust off my iPod and plug myself into some sweet tunes, and pretend that they are simply singing along with the 80’s hairband ballad or movie soundtrack that I’ll be jammin’ to, why not?

And to answer my question… YES, totally worth it.  Exhausting, yet worth it.

This post was written by the lovely Nicole of Perfectly Askew. Go check out her blog before her kids drive her so insane all she can do is drool on the keyboard (haven’t we all been there?)
Posted on October 22, 2014 by Holdin' Holden 2 Comments
Holdin' Holden

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  • Yes, 100% true. And my husband still wonders why I take 30 minutes to go to the bathroom when he gets home. It’s because it is the only alone time I had ALL DAY!

  • This is totally awesome, and this is my life with my 3 year old. I’m on a long lost mission to pee by myself without being told “eww Mommy stinky!” Really, potty training sucks!!! The leave the door open policy has got me more criticism than compliance. Sorry didbt mean to rant here, great blog I’ll go look you up now.