Last year on this very day, I was experiencing my first “summer vacation” as an adult. That summer, I learned that the term “summer vacation” is nothing more than an evil and cruel play on words. Summer vacation is NO vacation for adults! What the hell?? First bills, and now this?
I find that as the summer goes on (and ON), the thoughts that run through my head begin to change from Mary Poppins to frickin’ Medusa. If only I could turn everyone to stone!!Now, either I’m completely insane, or other moms have these same thoughts too! I’m going to guess it’s a mixture of both. Do you remember the “this is your brain on drugs” commercial with the chick from “She’s all That” cracking the egg into a hot pan? Yeah. It’s like that. Commiserate with me! These are the thoughts that run through my head-
Yay, summer! No more waking up early for school!
Why are they waking up even earlier?? it’s SUMMER!!!
Oh well, at least I don’t have to make lunches or rush in the morning!
We get to spend more time together! Awesome! I’ve missed my school-kid
I really wish school would hurry up and start
Teachers do NOT get paid enough to put up with this shit!
Is my kid this annoying to everyone else?
Was I this annoying when I was their age??
I think bed time will come early tonight.
I think bed time will come RIGHT NOW
NO, I DON’T CARE IF IT’S STILL LIGHT OUT!
WHY IS EVERYONE YELLING?
WHY AM I YELLING??
DO I EVEN KNOW HOW TO NOT YELL ANYMORE?
WHAT DAY IS IT??
WHO AM I?
WHO ARE THESE LITTLE PEOPLE AND WHY ARE THEY CALLING ME “MOMMY”?
WHY IS EVERYTHING IN THIS HOUSE STICKY??
…. And that was just in the first hour. We’re going to need some strong drinks to make it through these next few months.
@Julieannefiu I still sing WRAPPED UP LIKE A DOUCHE. I think they're lying about the "real" lyrics
I sang SO many embarrassingly wrong song lyrics with such confidence. pic.twitter.com/Ww5TaAxY3r
@AndreaPerez0217 Not that I'm biased, but I highly recommend ;) Hope you enjoy!
Parenthood: you think it's gonna be all hugs & booboo kisses, but it's really cooking food everyone hates & scraping boogers off of walls.
School system: Here! Have a half day on Friday the 13th! Me: pic.twitter.com/Dy18C8R3dD
Spooking the Kids Without Scarring them for LIFE With Netflix! (and a giveaway!) goo.gl/fb/tkeWgB