If I were to say that I wasn’t disappointed when the ultrasound tech told me my little uterine nugget had a penis during the gender ultrasound of my second pregnancy- I’d be lying. All I’d ever wanted was ONE little girl, and now I was going to have two boys. What was I going to do with two boys?? Dress them up as girls to fill a void that otherwise may remain empty forever?
As crushed as I was, once Parker was born, I never once thought “I wish he was a girl!” It never even crossed my mind. All of the disappointment I’d felt during the gender ultrasound faded away and actually seemed pretty silly to me. But that void… that void was still there. I thought it always would be. It wasn’t something that actively bothered me; only when shopping for clothes and dealing with a crappy selection when the girls department was overflowing with adorable frilly stuff. Boys get the shaft! If I can’t have a shopping-loving girl, I can at least still love shopping, right? Apparently not. I don’t like sports, I hate getting dirty, I’m a big fat baby when it comes to bugs- what was I going to do with two boys?
I never wanted to pressure my kids to dislike sports just so I’d never have to sit in a field for hours on a buttsweat hot afternoon watching people run back and forth or whatever it is they do- so I let it ride. I’d sit back and let them decide, without my influence, what they truly enjoyed and wanted to do.
Both boys love cars and dinosaurs and bugs and sharks. They are obsessed with scary shows and BEG to watch movies that would give them nightmares for years to come (I never give in to those pleas). They both love having long hair but hate when I brush it. That’s pretty much where the similarities end.
Maybe it’s because he’s home with me all day. Maybe it’s because he wants SOMETHING for himself that he doesn’t have to share with his big brother- but while Holden moans and groans about all things girly (including girls), Parker will ask me to paint one of his nails and show it off proudly. It’s paint. It’s colorful. I can see why any little kid regardless of gender would be interested, especially a little kid who hasn’t been around other little kids that might be saying “that’s for girls!” He does whatever the hell he wants, and doesn’t care about labels or stereotypes or if he’s playing with something that is bright pink. He likes jewelry and will stop to look at it in a store. He has decent taste, too. I may not have a girl, but I’m not totally left out. Or so I thought.
When we arrived at Disney World for the first time, Parker was 1 1/2 and Holden was 3 1/3. They were obsessed with the movie “Cars” and pretty much anything Pixar, so they were pretty thrilled. I, however…. not so much. The void returned. Disney is MADE for girls with dreams of being princesses. Neither of my boys had ever dreamed of princesses. I don’t think they’d even seen a princess movie at that point. They might not even have known what a princess was. All of the moments and magic geared toward girls seemed like magic I’d never get to witness. Do I think any of this means anything? Um. no. I think he’s a curious kid exploring all things life has to offer. The void ached. If only I’d had a girl, it could have been different.
Not long after that trip, Tangled came on TV- and it changed everything. I’d never been really into princesses when I was little (though I did love me some Aladdin and Ariel), so when the Disney princess door swung open, it did for all of us, and on our next Disney trip, those magical moments I never thought I’d have? I had them. Without a little girl. From that moment on, Parker, who is as carefree as any child could be, who loves without thinking twice, who doesn’t care what people think about him or how long his hair is, or how he talks, or what he does, continues to teach me and the people who get to witness his magical moments along with me, including his older “ugh that’s for girls” brother, just how different the world can be if we stop setting silly limits.
I know for a fact that Parker is not the only boy who waits in line to meet the princesses at Disney, and I am not saying this because I created the little dude, but there is something different that happens when he meets them. Something that not only other parents are “aww”ing over, but the Disney photographers and princesses are, too. On our most recent trip, his giddiness to meet Cinderella spread through the park and hours later when he walked in to meet Rapunzel, the photographers knew who he was, and one was absolutely blown away. “He really loves princesses?” *pauses and watches for a while* “That is so awesome.” Yes, it is- and I want to share the magic with all of you.
He’s never going to cut it now!
He loves Aurora… but apparently not our DOG Aurora- since he announced to the Princess that Aurora is bad because she pees and poops on the floor. Oops.
I literally have about 30 pictures like the two above because he would not let go of her. Sorry people in line behind us!
“Watch out for this one, he’s princess crazy!”
Even sour-puss “I don’t want to meet the princesses” Holden can’t resist Rapunzel
They had a good long chat about hair products
Parker (to Rapunzel): You have LONG hair!
Rapunzel: Your hair is getting pretty long, too! Do you ever get tangles?
Parker: No, I have tangle spray
Rapunzel: TANGLE SPRAY?? You have spray that takes out tangles? I’ve never heard of such a thing!
Parker: and it smells like strawberries! Smell it!
Rapunzel: *smells his hair* Oh it DOES smell like strawberries!
Holden: We both have long hair! *lifts his hair, then motions to Parker*
Rapunzel: Oh, does your hair smell like strawberries, too?
Holden: Well, we ARE from the same family.
*entire room breaks into hysterical laughter*
Snow White: Do you think that would work on dwarf beards?
There was one moment, though, that was more magical than all of this. I smile so hard my face hurts watching him woo the princesses, but this actually made me tear up. My little guy, lover of princesses, was chosen to be Beast in “Enchanted tales with Belle” (a newer attraction). I have never seen him so happy as she pulled him in front of everyone and they danced together.
Couldn’t you just die?
My little boy loves colorful nail polish, sparkly jewelry, long hair, and princesses. Do I think there is anything “wrong” with this? In one word: No. I think it’s amazing, and I think we could all stand to be a little more open to the world like Parker is. Think of all the things you might be missing out on because of a silly label. Someone out there is smiling and watching and teaching me and anyone who reads this that you don’t have to be a girl to like “girly” things. Things aren’t really “girly” anyway. Love what you love. Life is too short to care what someone else thinks.
That void I’ve had for years? It’s pretty damn full right now.
Getting my hair done today! Honestly more excited that my husband has to pick up the kids from school than I am about a fresh 'do
17 Stupidly Impossible Things our Kids Think we can do that we… well… can’t. goo.gl/fb/RrkM47
The fact that this is accurate for my life means it's finally happened: I've become my mother. pic.twitter.com/xrIGOoM5Q9
Vacation season is upon is! This is just your friendly reminder that trips with kids are NOT vacations. holdinholden.com/2016/03/vaca…
If you've ever dreamed of having a smaller, angrier version of yourself that you have to argue with over booger eating, kids are for you.
Repeat for infinity while yelling "I JUST CLEANED THAT" pic.twitter.com/pmfEpm3hJU
I love it when my kid is proud of his new accomplishments. I just wish he wouldn't come into my room at 5am to yell them at me while I sleep
Don't grow up- it's a trap! holdinholden.com/2017/05/10-w…
FYI: When I said "enough with the cold weather! It's MAY! Give us heat!" I didn't mean that I wanted to take a vacation to Satan's anus.