Nearly 4 years ago I began blogging about parenthood and all the weird, insane, annoying, and lovable crap that goes along with it. Almost 8 months ago I released the book based on all of those weird, insane, annoying, and lovable experiences i’d been through.
The response has been amazing, the readers (you all) are amazing. I’ve had a really great time, it’s been fun, but I think it’s time for more.
I don’t think it’s just me that works really friggin’ hard on something and then wants to see it succeed to the highest it can succeed- or maybe i’m just stupidly ambitious- either way, doesn’t matter. I’m ready for more. I think the book deserves more. I really believe in it, and I believe that if it could just get more attention, it could be huge- but it’s been tough as hell. It’s, to me, not just a book about my life, or poop stories, but one about being YOURSELF as a mother, not getting lost, or letting anyone shit all over you or how you feel or needing to vent. And it’s also about protecting yourself against internet assholes. And those are all messages I think deserve to be spread far and wide.
I’m self published, no money for marketing or anything else, everything I do I pay out of my own pocket for- it’s push push push and lemme tell y’all, it’s exhausting!
On Tuesday, Kelly, from Live! With Kelly (which used to be Regis & Kelly) read a little note I wrote to her on air and suddenly I got a kick in the ass. It’s time to push like i’m pushing out a 14 lb giant headed crotch-fruit. Sure to be difficult as hell, but CAN be done with enough lube and people on both ends to encourage and to catch.
So i’ve started an internet campaign so to speak, and I don’t often ask for help (a stubborn thing I am), but I need your help on this one. Saturating the market- and that’s where you come in, if you’d be so awesome. Anyone who wants to help, believes in my writing, or me, or thinks i’m funny, or thinks I should get my ass on a book tour and come near them to shoot the shit-, or even anyone who just has a few moments to spare. Help me by writing letters, posting comments, getting the word out to different people and shows- and of course the more people they hear it from the more likely they are to listen. I’ll make it easy for you, here are some links- easy peasy!
TV- post/write to tell them to have me the hell on their shows!:
Live! With Kelly:
Write her a message: http://dadt.com/live/special/ask/
There is even a follower created FB page to further the campaign!: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Get-Holdin-Holden-on-Live-WITH-Kelly/292580274174102
Good Morning America:
Well, you can’t e-mail them, or post to their FB wall,
but if you have giant cahones, you can cold-call them! I plan on it.
Ellen Degeneres Show:
Show FB: https://www.facebook.com/ellentv
Ellen’s FB: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ellen-Degeneres/36772172240
Write Ellen an Email: http://ellen.warnerbros.com/show/respond/?PlugID=10
Contact: Can’t find an exact, but I did find a list of show topics? Maybe if we flood the kids & Parenting ones, someone will listen: http://www.rachaelrayshow.com/show-info/be-on-the-show/
That’s all I got for shows, but y’know, if you’re bored- and have any other ideas, toss’em out!
Simon and Schuster
FB (where they have a message function): https://www.facebook.com/HarperCollins
Email address: email@example.com
FB (message function AND you can post on their wall): https://www.facebook.com/RandomHouseInc
Contact (they swear they read every message: http://www.randomhouse.com/cgi-bin/feedback/feedback.php?loc=http://www.randomhouse.com/
FB (message & comment): https://www.facebook.com/PenguinGroupUSA?ref=ts
Email to “be on the show” http://www.bethennytv.com/show/respond/?PlugID=781/
The Hampton Roads Show. LOCAL (to me) Show. Tell them to have me on!
if you need suggestions on what to say? Just be HONEST. If you like my book, love my book. Like my blog, love my blog. If you think I speak for all honest mothers, or if i’m just funny. And tell them why.
I always say- make it hard for people to say no. Be persistent to the point of ALMOST being annoying, but not quite. And don’t give up. Sure, good things come to people who wait, but some people wait forever- and i’m not waiting anymore!
I know it seems like a lot y’all, it IS a lot, and of course I don’t expect anyone to do anything, or all of it- even just ONE email, one comment, one anything is helping me get the word out there, and THAT I appreciate it in and of itself. I appreciate the comments, the feedback, the reviews, the chance to make all of you laugh- and I hope to be able to CONTINUE to do that for you and for a hell of a lot more people!
Thank you all in advance! If anyone gets a LEGIT positive “yes” response.. well.. there may be a gift in it for you out of pure appreciation!
Every. Single. Time. pic.twitter.com/aAAWWjdrN3
I'm either "I HAVE 3 FRIES LEFT DON'T TOUCH MY PLATE!" or "Please take this so I can't eat any more of it!" There is no in-between.
Dear people writing articles on ways to get siblings to get along, I'll save you the time. The answer is "Don't let them play together"
Please stop Complimenting my kids’ “Good” Behavior goo.gl/fb/rwfojS
Hard pass from me pic.twitter.com/VayvW1eopK
I've gotten to the point where I'd let my kids summon a demon with a Ouija board before I'd let them play Monopoly together again.