Mommy and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

There are some days… maybe even a lot of days, we as people, or as parents, would prefer to forget. Even better, we’d prefer to have them scorched from our memories. Brain bleach? Yes please.
I think we all prefer only to have good days. AWESOME days. Holy shit best day ever days- but the reality of that happening? Well, for most normal folks- or at least those of us not tripping on LSD or eating a bag of magic mushrooms- it’s a pipe dream.

You always hear those annoying fuckers saying “with the good comes the bad”, “the grass is always greener”, “what goes up most come down”, and “the glass is half full”– and you just DO NOT want to believe it, especially when you are feeling quite the opposite.
  Oh hell no with that optimism bullshit! Not in the middle of MY bad day!

Not on THAT kind of day.

The kind of day where you wake up with both kids in your bed, awake, and you’re being shoved off the edge. The kind of day where one child has a paint-peeling meltdown before 8am, you realize you don’t have what you need to make the breakfast you want so you’re stuck with toast, and your husband nitpicks and bitches to the point you want to smother the life out of him. The kind of day where your child just won’t stop fucking SCREAMING no matter WHAT you do, for hours on end, to the point where you honestly feel like you might explode, and anything anyone does, even just speaking to the red-faced screecher makes it worse. The kind of day with multiple potty accidents, very little patience, body aches and pains and it’s not even lunch time yet. The kind of day where you’re congested, the kids are congested, and you’ve never seen so many boogers in your life, you want to take the kids outside but not only is it too cold but it will likely make you all sicker and prolong the irritation, and a news broadcast breaks through the one show you wanted to watch during what you hope will be a long nap time, but isn’t.
The kind of day where you are hanging on for dear fucking life until bed time-and not YOUR bed time- but the kids’ bed time, just so you can have a little bit of silence to regain rational thinking and psyche yourself up to be able to deal with the next day.

The kind of day where you relate to that whiny little turd Alexander.

The only possible savior of a day like this (other than a gigantic drink of the alcoholic nature) is knowing it’s just one day, JUST ONE- and that some day- maybe not ANY day soon (read: far the fuck in the future)- there’s a slim possibility you can look back at it and laugh.

Until then? I think i’ll move to Australia.

Posted on March 6, 2012 by Holdin' Holden 7 Comments
Holdin' Holden

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  • Everyone has bad days. they are the reason that good days are good 🙂
    I could go on for hours about how to make them better…. but Rather just say… It can always get worse… LOL

  • i’d tell you it could be worse.. but i really like to be alive, so i won’t 🙂
    what i will say is this: draining the life and sanity out of a mother HAS to be hard work, and you just need to stay strong. they can’t keep it up forever, maybe you can outlast them!! LOL mommy juice helps too, though. love ya!!

  • I HATE those days! It’s nice to read about someone else having them, sometimes I just think I’m a shitty mom. lol Thanks!

  • I remember having THOSE days. When the kids were little, things went wrong before you even got out of bed, then the day goes from bad to worse. Even things that normally wouldn’t bother you, really, really piss you off. Rest assured, as the kiddies grow, you still have them 🙂 I had one the other day, I wanted to strangle my mother (who I care for), my usually recalcitrant teens decided that would be the day they would actually converse with me, three of them, waffling in turns, ALL day. I could go on, but all I can say is: *HUGS FOR YOU* 🙂

  • I love that book… lol i have those days often… we are going through the turd threes and ur blog gets me through

  • This mommy votes for new zealand,instead of austraila because there arent any poisonus bugs or anything there, and if you stay the eff out of the ocean, no sharks either….just something to think about….plus its a peasnt temp year round AND its beautiful.

  • LOL! The Australia part comes from the book “Alexander and the terrible horrible no good very bad day” where on every page he says he’ll move to australia because his day was so bad