As if I don’t dislike the holiday season enough, what with the cold weather and the crowds and the multitude of other terrible things that go hand in hand with crazed shoppers trying to get their hands on an XBox for $20 off, throw the wrapping of gifts in the mix and you have a recipe for hell.
I know some people LOVE to wrap gifts. The ribbons, the bows, the pretty result that you can show off under your tree. For me, it is quite the opposite. I dread wrapping presents.
I find it a long, tedious, and terrible process. All the cutting and the folding and the attempting to tape things that don’t want to stay together and having it come apart and then starting all over again. Never having the right amount of paper and having your gift look like a patchwork quilt.
All of this time, energy, effort, and frustration- hours worth of it, only for your kids to tear everything apart in under 10 minutes and have it all left in shards and heaps on the living room floor. It always leaves me questioning WHY?!
Obviously, I know the reason why… but really, WHY?
The whole process is so exhausting to me that every year I end up procrastinating and putting it off until the very last second, up at 2am on Christmas morning trying to wrap quietly enough as to not wake the children and have them come stairs and figure out that Santa is just code for MOMMY.
This year I was bound and determined to get the shit done early. We hadn’t gotten ALL of the presents for the boys yet, but Thomas and I wrapped everything we had. Hours later, I was completely exhausted and frustrated that his gifts looked about a thousand times better than mine (even the boxes in funny shapes). When we finally got the next set of presents in… I couldn’t bring myself to do the same thing over again. I still haven’t found the motivation to pull all the supplies back out and begin the process for the 2nd time.
And it isn’t like I can even put my hard work out for the world to see (and by the world, I mean me) because if the kids get the whiff of wrapping paper they have the instinctive urge to tear, and there is NO WAY IN HELL i’m wrapping for a 3rd time.
Every. Single. Time. pic.twitter.com/aAAWWjdrN3
I'm either "I HAVE 3 FRIES LEFT DON'T TOUCH MY PLATE!" or "Please take this so I can't eat any more of it!" There is no in-between.
Dear people writing articles on ways to get siblings to get along, I'll save you the time. The answer is "Don't let them play together"
Please stop Complimenting my kids’ “Good” Behavior goo.gl/fb/rwfojS
Hard pass from me pic.twitter.com/VayvW1eopK
I've gotten to the point where I'd let my kids summon a demon with a Ouija board before I'd let them play Monopoly together again.