Parker is not a man of many words- and I don’t mean just because he doesn’t say as many words as most kids his age. He chooses everything he does say very wisely, so when he does tell you something- you know he really means it, he’s a thoughtful little thing… whereas Holden is the “OMG can you please stop talking for TWO seconds before my head explodes?” kind of kid.
When Parker FIRST said my name in association with me (outside of when he was very young, it stopped shortly after that) I had a picturesque commercial mommy moment. It took him over 2 years to say my name and for me to know he REALLY meant that he wanted ME. Cue the tears and the blubbering and the feeling of absolute elation. And that feeling didn’t leave for a full month. It was so nice to FINALLY know he wanted ME outside of his usual grunts and points that I almost couldn’t get over it… and then he began to abuse the word.
Suddenly, the extreme excitement and joy over him calling my name turned into a total obsession of sorts for him. EVERY little life event was either preceded or followed by a MAMA MAMA MAMA MAMA.
MAMA! because he’s at the top of the stairs with five thousand toys and wants me to come and carry all of them, plus his lazy ass down.
MAMA! just because i’ve walked out of direct eyesight
MAMA! because I went to the bathroom and that is completely unacceptable.
MAMA! because I turned the TV off and he wants it back on, because life cannot be lived without the boob-tube on at full blast.
MAMA X5 because the top of the shape sorter just won’t fit back on
MAMA MAMAAAAA!!!! because we are in public, and I have walked away to go and try to find SOMETHING that fits my squishy self, and he wants me to look at him… followed by hysterical laughter, and another “MAMA!”
Don’t get me wrong- I find it all endearing and sweet that he wants my attention so often, especially since he basically used to hate me and opt for Thomas- but i’m starting to feel like one of those crazy people who constantly think their cell phone is ringing when it isn’t.
Sometimes I wonder if i’ve just lost my damn mind; it wouldn’t surprise me at all. I hear him calling MAMA in my sleep now.
When you have a man of few words living in your home, and the one word he chooses to say 99% of the word is YOUR name… no matter how cute their voice is, no matter how squishy the cheeks or large the dimples- it will begin to make you want to tear your hair out.
I don’t need you to yell my name like Stewie Griffin just because i’m not looking at you… when i’m sitting right next to you.
I don’t need you to yell my name when you’re taking a dump and i’m standing right next to you. I’m well aware of what you’re doing.
I do, however, love when he says my name, only to pull me into a snuggle for absolutely no reason. That might make the insanity and straight jacket worth it.
Parker really needs to hurry up and learn Holden’s name. Then they can annoy…er… entertain each other all day. All I would need is to invest in a nice pair of earplugs.
The “Are You Ready to Have Kids?” Checklist of Doom goo.gl/fb/DTPJ1A
If anyone asks how I died, you can just go ahead and tell them "she was lured in by free pie in exchange for listening to 2nd graders screech Thanksgiving songs for 30 minutes"
Half-Assed Jingler Syndrome goo.gl/fb/McWfBy
@ItsEvieClaire Booze and tears
I'm not saying this is the perfect #Christmas gift for all the parents in your life, but.... okay, yeah I am. That's exactly what I'm saying. Truths from the bowels of parenthood! amazon.com/Kids-Are-Turds…
@Gofashiondeals All of that and more. Good times. Gooooood times