For right now, having two boys is pretty cool. I don’t have any creepy dolls with their fixed eyes following me around the room. No pink froo-froo crap. No fairy princess BS. Sure, i’d like a girl- but I really think all of the things I listed would have to go on the “con” list for me. Just not into it!
Having boys means we can be rough and play with cars and robots (not that girls can’t, mind you, but generally boys don’t play with froo-froo dolls), and they can burp whenever they want without having to be scolded that it’s not “ladylike”
I’m also pretty pleased with the fact that if I decide that Parker will be my last child, that when they’re 18 i’ll still be relatively “young.” I can leave the turds at home and go traveling the world with Thomas. The farthest out of the country i’ve been is Canada, and I want MORE!
However, with all that said, there are things about boys that I definitely don’t look forward to when they get older.
The massive amounts of food they will consume (assuming Parker ever gets to regular eating habits), the smelly armpits… and especially bodily changes.
After years of dealing with baby/toddler penis, i’m still not used to it. It’s still weird to me to have to hold Holden’s pecker when he pees, or the strange hard-ons they get for no reason. With age that will only get worse and I know it.
I am terrified of the day I walk in on one of them masturbating into a sock- and we all know it’s bound to happen at least once in their lifetime. What do do? How to act? What to say?? I’m positive i’ll be more embarrassed than either of them- it’s something I have nightmares about. Can I just keep them as little kids forever as to not ever have to experience that? To avoid the awkward sex talk and hoards of skanky girlfriends they’ll bring home?
Just remember: calories don't count today. But just in case... wear stretchy pants. pic.twitter.com/vOCiF0YpEG
Being a parent makes you thankful for some weird shit holdinholden.com/2013/11/what…
My favorite part of Thanksgiving is the part where my kids whine about being hungry all day and then only eat mashed potatoes.
What you REALLY need to make Holiday (or ANY) Travel Bearable goo.gl/fb/1BdFtj
Other moms: I finished Christmas shopping for my kids in June! Me: pic.twitter.com/FT3tlWGWd2
@CJPendragon learn something new every day!
@WeberWriting Absolutely. It takes a bit of time and juggling but it is 100% doable. Just have to ignore the sanctimommies of the world
Don't feel bad for tossing frozen chicken strips in the oven and calling it dinner. Don't even feel bad if you don't turn them over. holdinholden.com/2016/05/shit…
To the piece of crap who broke into my car over the weekend- You think you found nothing of value to steal, but you actually took with you the nasty head cold my family has been passing around in that very vehicle for the past week. Enjoy, scumbag! xoxo, Germ Infested SUV