No one needs to inform me that i’m lame- I already know! I fully accept and own my lameness, I just can’t help it.
Most days I feel like if I don’t get the hell out of the house and away from the kids my head may literally explode, or I might sell the kids to a traveling circus. Both of those sound like a tropical vacation by the end of my bad days. When a friend invites me to an evening out, I am ecstatic, can’t wait! Get me out of here! Being stuck in this house day in and day out with absolutely no break is down right maddening. Mommies need and deserve breaks..
Although once i’m out, it doesn’t matter where I am, who i’m with, what i’m doing or how great of a time we’re having- I think about the kids and how I want to be at home with them. It’s insane, I know! EVERY time i’m out, being at home is on my mind. If the kids aren’t in bed, and it’s a daytime trip? I’m basically going crazy thinking about how I need to get home as soon as humanly possible.
I’m in this huge mind-losing circle. When i’m home I want to be out, and when i’m out I want to be home! I can’t say for sure if this happens to ALL other moms, or maybe i’m clingier than my own children are. I feel like i’m missing a limb when i’m not around them, out of the house without them.
When did I become such a home body? I really have no idea when it happened. I remember sitting at home on a Friday night when I was younger meaning the death of my social life. Absolute humiliation. Now my idea of a fun Friday night is sitting at home, having a drink while watching Ghost Adventures and playing a board game.. MAYBE with some friends.
How old do I sound right now? I love board games! I can’t wait until Holden is old enough to really be able to play them so we can have family game night. I’ll finally have someone to play them with! Playing against Thomas is just no fun, he wins everything.
I am definitely having one of those days today where all I want to do is get the hell out of this house. The whining! I can’t take any more whining! I’ve learned from past experience that once i’m out i’ll end up being a huge party pooper looking at the time on my phone, wondering when we’ll be going home. I suck!
We actually have friends coming over this evening to play games, their idea not mine! So either board games are just as awesome as I think they are, and i’m not so lame.. or my friends are lame too. I choose not to believe the latter. Hopefully choosing to stay in rather than go out won’t bite me in the ass like it did last time- with Holden waking up every 5 minutes the entire time we had company over.. for no reason other than that he wanted to. I need a bigger, more soundproof house!
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