Assuming I don’t randomly start puking my face off in the next few hours- I am going out tonight with some friends for Karaoke at a pretty shady dive bar. It should be interesting if nothing else!
My stomach’s been a little iffy today but I think that’s probably Aunt Flo wreaking havoc on my insides.
Ugh, cross your fingers! I REALLY need to get out of this house!!!
The “Are You Ready to Have Kids?” Checklist of Doom goo.gl/fb/DTPJ1A
If anyone asks how I died, you can just go ahead and tell them "she was lured in by free pie in exchange for listening to 2nd graders screech Thanksgiving songs for 30 minutes"
Half-Assed Jingler Syndrome goo.gl/fb/McWfBy
@ItsEvieClaire Booze and tears
I'm not saying this is the perfect #Christmas gift for all the parents in your life, but.... okay, yeah I am. That's exactly what I'm saying. Truths from the bowels of parenthood! amazon.com/Kids-Are-Turds…
@Gofashiondeals All of that and more. Good times. Gooooood times