Thomas may have the boys fawning all over him from the moment he walks in the door until bed time, but there is one thing he will likely never have that I can hold over his head if I so choose as a way of saying “I win!” or the equally as childish “told you so”..
And that is that I can basically read my kids minds. Crazy? I think not. Most moms will tell you that they know what their children are thinking, feeling, wanting, or needing without any spoken communication. I know what to do to get a desired action, and what NOT to do in order to contain a massive meltdown. I even know what they’re going to do BEFORE they do it.
Now I don’t know if this is just a ‘mommy instinct’ thing- I think that’s a little selfish to assume, or if perhaps it’s because I spend SO much time with them that as strange as they are, they have become somewhat predictable.
And what I loathe about Thomas, or really men in general- is that you’ll tell them something, that you KNOW is right- and they’ll go ahead and do the opposite just because they will always think their way is better.
That holds true for everything about the boys. One would think I know better only because I stay home so much with them and have become accustomed to everything that they do- and therefore know what should and should not be done when it comes to them.
Case in point- I have told Thomas time and time again NOT to let Parker play on the bed unless we are all sitting on it with him. Why? Because I know Parker is a huge klutz with zero balance and the common sense of a rock (like most children his age). Time and time again, though- Thomas has let him play on the bed at random times throughout the day and 9 times out of 10, the kid has taken a head first tumble off.
I’ve also reminded him more times than I can count not to get upset with Parker when he takes a PAINFULLY long time to eat, because that will encourage him to eat even less. Men and their stubbornness and lack of patience.. sigh. He gets frustrated every time, and every time I have to have him walk away and I take over. BAM, Parker eats no problem.
The least annoying and most funny example I can give you though is a story about Thomas having to take over lunch time duties when I was out getting my tattoo. Holden has sort of a lunch routine. He gets a turkey sandwich Monday through Thursday, and then his special treat on Friday is a PB&J. It’s just the way we’ve always done it, and it works for us.
Well, while I was gone, Thomas decided he wanted to spoil Holden to get into his good graces and made Holden a PB&J on Saturday
This bit him in the ass when they sat down to eat and Holden takes one bite of the sandwich and says “Daddy, this does NOT have enough jelly on it!”
Mommy does it best! Holden knows it, I wonder if Thomas will ever catch on?
Leftovers are great for 2 things: Easy, quick dinners, and getting to hear your kids complain about the same meal twice in a week!
@anninabyrne He mentioned something about penis trampolines. I don't even know.
My 10 yo didn't know that Dick is short for Richard so he's spent the past 10 yrs thinking Dick's Sporting Goods is a store for penis sports
8yo told me that Oct 31st is "national knock-knock joke day"- which means Halloween will henceforth be known as "The Most Annoying Day Ever"
@SassyPsychDoc "It seemed like a good idea at the time"
@SassyPsychDoc I fact-checked him myself. Someone was seriously sleeping on the job that day
Thought my 8yo was lying when he said that a male woodchuck is a he-chuck & a female is a she-chuck.Nope. If I have to know that, so do you!
Sometimes advice from our kids is EXACTLY what we need to hear. Been a rough few months & what my 8yo said hit home holdinholden.com/2017/10/winn…
10yo: What is calculus? Me: It's you + me = us Husband: get out. #oldpeoplejokes