Lately i’ve been catching Parker like a dirty politician: pants around his ankles and a shit eating grin on his face.
None of his pants fit, regardless of size. The kid has a huge round pot belly, but the tiniest little hips. No matter what I seem to put him in, his pants are always falling down.
He could probably wear 6 month pants in the waist to fit in the hip area, but in the leg area he wears anything from 12 month pants to 18 month pants depending on the brand. Unfortunately, the bigger you go in length, the bigger the width gets in the waist.
The pants I put him in today were 18 month pants. Perfect in length, but I could probably squeeze two of him into the waist area. Just absolutely HUGE.
And since none of his pants, for some reason, have an adjustable waist.. there’s seemingly nothing I can do.
I tried to McGuyver his pants today by folding in the waist and then bobbypinning it to try and keep them tight.. but after going through 2 bobbypins in an hour- it was clear that just wasn’t going to cut it.
At one point I turned and looked at him and just saw him grinning at me. He was standing up, holding onto his playhouse.. totally bare from the waist down other than a diaper. His pants were long gone. He finds the situation hilarious.. until he’s trying to crawl or stand and ends up slipping all over the floor because his pants are sagging so low that they catch under his feet.
The ONE pair of adjustable shorts we do have.. not only can we not use anymore because it’s cold outside, but even on the tightest setting they weren’t quite tight enough.
I end up making him look like a scrub and rolling the waistband down just to get some extra fabric between him and the band, therefore holding them up.. but making the legs too short.
We need to get the kid a belt. I think that’s really the only option for the skinny thing. Don’t know how it will work with his pants that DON’T have belt loops.. but some pants fitting are better than none.
This again reinforces my thought that there need to be sizes for babies like there are for adults. Half sizes? Tall sizes? Thin sizes? Short sizes? Any of those would be helpful.. but none exist. My kid is going to be diaper mooning people for the next year.
I've never had a near death experience, but I DID find 2 spiders in my house this morning, and that's pretty much the same thing.
If you like to be constantly criticized over your peanut butter to jelly ratio on sandwiches, being a parent is definitely for you.
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