Never ask Thomas what to get the kids for their birthdays or Christmas. He has no idea. He SHOULD, but I think he goes blank under pressure (only when talking about the kids, really).. and all that comes out is “books are always good.”
This is why our house is OVERFLOWING in books. The stupid thing coming out of our wall that looks like it used to be a plant holder (with recessed lighting above it) and at the bottom sort of looks like a book shelf that I desperately wanted to tear out when we moved in.. has actually become more of a help these days than a nuisance. I don’t know where we’d put all the books if it weren’t for that hideous thing.
We get so many books from other people I can’t even remember the last time we actually bought one..
So when we got two $50.00 gift cards in the mail from Thomas’ grandparents for the boys birthdays.. I had NO idea how we would ever spend that much on books for them.
We made plans to take them both to Borders today and let Holden basically pick out whatever he wanted. I promised we’d find him Cars and Dragon books.. other than that I was out of ideas.
Thomas took Parker to the little cafe to give him lunch and I led Holden over to the clearance section first. Within 5 seconds he found this HUGE puzzle book with cars and trucks in it. I told him to take it over to Daddy (no way could we lug that thing around with us) and he tore ass through the store screaming “LOOK DADDY! A TRUCK BOOK!”
This was rinse and repeat for the next 3 books he picked out. The people typing away on their laptops and attempting to read quietly looked mighty perturbed.
Then we made a beeline for the kids section. My eyes started blurring we spent so long in there. Holden picked out books for himself and books for Parker. He also found a little stuffed animal of one of his favorite book characters “Skippyjon Jones” and had to have it. He screamed about the damn thing the entire way back through the store and it has not left his side since.
The hardest most frustrating task had to be trying to find a friggin’ Dragon book. Not even specifically “How to train your dragon”.. but just ANYTHING with Dragons. I couldn’t find anything that wasn’t way out of his comprehension level. At one point I tried to pawn off a dinosaur book on him to see if he’d bite. He looks at it and says to me (with the snottiest voice he could muster) “That’s not a dragon, Mommy.”
We had to walk and get assistance all the way across the store and back.. to come out of it with 2 paperback Dragon books. Definitely not what we were hoping for!
By all calculations, I swore we’d still have enough money left on one of the gift cards to come back once “How to Train Your Dragon” was released so we could pick it up.
WRONG! Not only did we spent the entire $100, but $20 over that as well. Oops.
Seems to be well worth it because Holden spent the rest of the day insisting on playing with his new Toy Story sticker book and 2 foot tall Cars coloring book, and reading the rest of them again and again. And I don’t have to read the SAME stories i’ve been reading him for the billionth time anymore.
Now, though, I have the arduous task of cleaning out the bookshelf of books Holden never reads, or ones he’s torn apart and we kept just for variety’s sake. I fear how long and tedious that will be.. but now with the addition of new non-slobbered, torn, and bitten books.. it’s a task that MUST be done.
The “Are You Ready to Have Kids?” Checklist of Doom goo.gl/fb/DTPJ1A
If anyone asks how I died, you can just go ahead and tell them "she was lured in by free pie in exchange for listening to 2nd graders screech Thanksgiving songs for 30 minutes"
I'm not saying this is the perfect #Christmas gift for all the parents in your life, but.... okay, yeah I am. That's exactly what I'm saying. Truths from the bowels of parenthood! amazon.com/Kids-Are-Turds…
@Gofashiondeals All of that and more. Good times. Gooooood times