After living in VA for my entire life (minus 7 months), you’d think i’d expect the wacky bi-polar weather that has been going on for as long as I can remember. Snow one day, 70 the next. They forecast snow? It ends up warm. They forecast rain? Not a cloud in the sky.
Perhaps it’s just the meteorologists not being qualified for their jobs.. but they’ve been the same ones since I was a kid, so i’m assuming that they’re doing their job right and the weather around these parts just refuses to cooperate.
Still, in all my years, i’ve never seen a season completely skipped over altogether. That is, until now.
Where is Spring?? It literally went from snowstorm type weather to tornado watches and 78 degrees and the type of sun that will burn your skin in 5 minutes flat it’s so bright and hot.
There was maybe ONE day of weather in the 60’s and now it’s scorching. Having to turn on my air conditioning type of hot, because opening the windows is just not adequate because i’m literally sweating like a pig and so is Parker. And then the sweat combines because you have skin touching skin and it gets slippery and disgusting.. and that’s just not fun for ANYONE.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE warm weather. And for ONCE I don’t have to be HUGE, fat, pregnant and miserable in the summer time. I just feel like i’ve been sneak attacked. I don’t know that I have ANY summer clothes in the right size for Parker, and i’ve only just started stocking up on shorts for Holden. Me? I don’t wear shorts anyways. Capris maybe, shorts no.. so i’m ok.
And warm weather means better moods all around! So perhaps crabby bitches with sour sandy vaginas will finally perk up, get out and bask in the sunlight, shave their legs, get laid, and find something productive to do… then again, I doubt sour vaginas will ever change.
I certainly don’t like to sweat.. it’s uncomfortable and slightly embarrassing (and I take medication for hyperhidrosis so I know exactly what it’s like to be embarrassed by sweaty palm syndrome, but it’s a hell of a lot better than shivering and not being able to put on enough layers to not be miserable.
And along with the warm weather comes new milestones for both kids. Parker sitting unnassisted, getting very close to crawling, and very annoyingly attempting to cut a SECOND tooth. The biggest? Saying “DADA”. Now, I should be pissed.. and part of me is, but I suppose it’s only fair since Holden refused to say Dada until he was about a year old when he was saying MAMA and “I want my mama!” around 6 months. Suppose it’s Thomas’ turn to feel all special.. even though we all know Parker is completely and totally obsessed with me.
And Holden can now name songs and artists just by ME singing it to him. He can also name TV shows by me singing or humming the theme songs. One might be concerned he’s watching too much TV.. but really, he only listens to the music and then goes back to playing. Little musical genius on my hands! Makin’ mama proud.
Summer is upon us, y’all. I, for one, could not be happier!
Leftovers are great for 2 things: Easy, quick dinners, and getting to hear your kids complain about the same meal twice in a week!
@anninabyrne He mentioned something about penis trampolines. I don't even know.
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@SassyPsychDoc "It seemed like a good idea at the time"
@SassyPsychDoc I fact-checked him myself. Someone was seriously sleeping on the job that day
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10yo: What is calculus? Me: It's you + me = us Husband: get out. #oldpeoplejokes