One of my favorite things to do when I was younger was to mess around with my hair. Change styles all the time.. and constantly dying it different colors. I experimented with dying, bleaching, highlighting, low lighting.. pretty much every color under the sun- my hair has been at one point in my life. I started doing it so much that my hair got over processed and completely fried- and that’s when the obsession had to end and I started getting the coloring done professionally so that it wouldn’t all fall out.
One thing I never messed with was hair cutting. When you dye your hair and mess up, you can ALWAYS re-dye it and fix it, or tone it, or cover it up pretty easily. Cutting? Not so much. You cut too much off and you’re pretty much screwed.. and hair doesn’t grow back THAT fast.
And after MANY a horrid crooked ugly bang cutting experience thanks to my Mom, I certainly knew just how bad it could be and didn’t want to put myself through that ever again.
I’ve still always been interested in hair cutting though. Hell, before Parker was in the picture I was pretty set on going to hair school to get my license once Holden was in school. I certainly didn’t ever think i’d have to attempt a hair cut without ever being trained, or any practice on anything other than barbie dolls 20 years ago..
But Holden’s hair had gotten absolutely out of control. Typically, the stylist I go to would squeeze him in while my color was setting and give him a little trim but she just hasn’t had the time for the past few months- and now tells me he just doesn’t hold still enough for her to do it. I don’t necessarily think that’s true- i’ve seen other kids get their hair cut and they SCREAM and thrash and it ends up looking like shit. Holden’s never done that.. he just likes to turn his head and look at the scissors. Always a busy body.
She told me to just cut it myself. Sounded like a HORRIBLE idea to me.. the thought of messing up his hair and giving him one of those terrible childhood hair cuts where the kids head ends up looking like a penis, or like the mom literally stuck a bowl over the top and cut around it? PASS. Not to mention his hair is incredibly fine and shows every little flaw..
What else could I do though? I’m certainly not going to go to someone I don’t know or trust and pay for one of those horrible hair cuts. I know what I want his hair to look like, no one else ever seems to grasp that concept and it ends up too short.
Holden’s head isn’t exactly round.. because no one ever informed me a baby can get a flat head if they play on their back or sit in a bouncy chair for too long- so he CAN NOT have a buzzed head, or even a short hair cut without that fact becoming painfully obvious. He needs length to cover it up.. plus he looks good with long hair.
Today I sucked it up and decided it was time. It was time for me to dive in and give that kid the hair cut he so desperately needed. My first hair cut on a two year old?? I imagined it ending in disaster.
I pulled out a fine comb, a squirt bottle filled with water, a razor (no, not a straight razor actually MEANT for cutting hair, but a disposable meant for shaving faces) and a pair of scissors that Thomas claims are “cutting shears.”
Of course, I promised Holden a special big boy toy if he held still for the entire ordeal.. and so he sat in Thomas’ lap and I began. Nervously.
Spray, comb snip.. a little razoring. All went well until I got above Holden’s left ear and cut too much off. SHIT! I tried to hide it by razoring around it to layer it in, but it couldn’t really be saved. It isn’t a HUGE oopsie, I don’t think anyone else would even notice it but me- but i’ll be kicking myself in the ass until it grows out enough not to see it anymore.
The rest of the hair cut went amazingly smooth. Everything looks awesome.. dare I say, even professional. It’s the length I wanted, I thinned it out in the back and gave it a few layers- and the hair above the RIGHT ear? Perfect. Even more angering that I messed the left up so bad. Grrrr.
So here’s Holden’s hair before, totally 70’s shag going on:
Of course, I thought it was adorable but those mud flaps over his ears had to go, and he was growing a rogue mullet/duck tail in the back that could be pulled into a freaking ponytail.
And here are a few shots of after (keep in mind that his hair is VERY fine and curls.. so it looks poofy in places that would look good if they’d just stay straight):
First hair cut ever on a two year old? Damn fine job if I do say so myself. And unless I get taken over by pod people and suddenly decide that he needs a short hair cut.. i’ll be doing it myself from now on.
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Hard pass from me pic.twitter.com/VayvW1eopK
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