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The lesser of two evils… is still evil.

Tomorrow, Parker will be three months old. Three months and this child still won’t suck on a pacifier without it being held in his mouth.

I am in no way a binkie enthusiast. I hated how often Holden sucked on his, and am SO relieved to be rid of them for him. On the flip side- without a pacifier, Holden would have screamed 24 hours a day every single day for months.. so really, it was a sanity saver for me. As much as I hated giving it to him so often, it was a hell of a lot better than hearing him scream all day- and I know it soothed him too, so really there wasn’t much to complain about.

Honestly, I was more relieved that he was sucking a pacifier instead of his thumb. Words can not express my contempt for thumb sucking. I don’t think it’s cute, and with Holden I did not allow it. Not that he really tried all that often to pop a finger in his mouth, but when he did it instantly got pulled out and replaced with a binkie if he really wanted to suck on something.

Why the hatred for thumb-sucking? Ohhh so many reasons beyond just the “Ew that’s unsanitary” excuse.
I sucked my thumb for a VERY long time. Years. Due to that, and my parents not nipping it in the bud.. my teeth are royally screwed. Thumb sucking didn’t make them crooked (crowding did that), but it did give me an INTENSE overbite that made me insecure about my appearence for years. Even after 3 years of braces.. it’s really not any better now than before I had them. Talk about a waste of money!

My whacked jaw alinement has caused so many issues as an adult that i’d never want my children to go through it. Teeth grinding, TMJ, I can’t chew gum.. extreme tooth sensitivity- to sum it up in two words: It sucks.

If Parker were a happy baby all the time, i’d never bring out the pacifier for him.. would never force the issue- but that just isn’t the case.

The fact that he WANTS something to suck on and won’t take a binkie is beyond frustrating. Especially now.
The child has found his hands, and is using his thumb as a tool for soothing.

Constantly, he will be screaming and i’ll walk away either to take a breather in order to not freak out, or to go and get something, only to come back to a quiet baby only because his thumb is in his mouth and he’s sucking violently away on it.
I try replacing the thumb with a pacifier and he spits it out and the thumb goes right back in. He doesn’t do it all the time, usually when he’s very upset or very hungry.. but it’s becoming more and more frequent and more and more frustrating. And I know if I let it slide, he’ll start doing it just to do it instead of because of those reasons. You can take a binkie away- you can’t take a thumb away.

So what to do? Take the thumb away and have a screaming child and save his teeth & jaw.. or let him suck on it and have a peaceful house?
It’s choosing the lesser of two evils.. and neither is a choice I want to make because either way it goes still sucks. I keep trying all the different pacifiers hoping one day, he’ll just take one without any problems.. but it’s looking like a lost cause.


Posted on December 29, 2009 by Holdin' Holden 2 Comments
Holdin' Holden

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2 Comments

  • While I empathize with the issues you faced as a result of thumb sucking, Parker may not have the same issues. I sucked my thumb till I was 12 & have no issues as a result. I did get braces but that was for overcrowding. I think if it saves you some sanity, let him have at it, your super aware of the issues it causes so just stay on top of it & if the habit is causing severe problems you can nip it in the bud then. Good luck with your sanity search.

  • I don’t think sanitation is an issue right now. He isn’t particularly getting hold of anything/everything yet, but I agree that they can get addicted to the thumb. Just keep trying all kinds of pacis again. That’s what worked before, right? Or did you get rid of all the other pacis when he started taking the one? I wouldn’t suggest duct tape, but if it comes down to it… LOL j/k. Hope he decides binky is best for you soon!