There are many things I wish I would have known before Holden was born that people failed to mention in their onslaught of advice. Circumcision care, shushing, reflux advice.. but the one that bothers me the most is something that happened to Holden that I could not correct before it was too late.
The flat-head syndrome.
Doctors always tell you NEVER to put a baby to sleep on their tummy because of SIDS. While I understand the concern, tummy sleeping babies generally never have issues with getting flat spots on their head. No one advised us to rotate Holden’s head or to make sure he’s not always leaning on the same side while playing or while in a swing or bouncy chair.. so before I knew it, he had a massive flat spot on the back right side of his head.
Once I noticed it, I couldn’t stop noticing it. It wasn’t severe enough to warrant a corrective helmet (Which was a horrifying thought. He wouldn’t care.. but I would be humiliated by it).. but it was very very noticeable.
Many a night I snuck into his room and quickly moved his head off of his favorite spot to try and round his head back out.. and while we corrected it slightly, I can still see just how flat his head is compared to other children. While cutting his hair short has never even crossed my mind because I like short hair, it’s not even really an option anymore because of just how flat his head still is.
As soon as Parker was born, I was already paranoid about his head getting flat. It won’t get out of my mind. Every minute of every day I think about how the same thing could happen to him.. so since birth I have tried to make sure it doesn’t happen.. and unfortunately regardless of my attempts it appears that it is.
Just like Holden, no matter WHAT he is doing, he wants to rest on the back right side of his head. Unlike Holden, he gets REALLY pissed if I try to move him off of that side and onto the other. I’ve tried turning his bouncy chair backwards.. no dice. Tried moving his favorite hanging toys on his playmat to the other side- not interested. I’ve tried more tummy time and holding him while he’s napping as well just to reduce the amount of time he spends on his head at all. If we try to move him while he’s sleeping- he wakes up. Sadly it appears to be a lost cause and I can already see a flat spot forming and it makes me so so upset.
I’m not sure what to do at this point. I’ve done everything recommended to me by everyone and it’s still happening- so what do I do? I do NOT want him to get a massive flat spot like Holden. He’s still so young, I can’t even comprehend how it’s beginning already (as we didn’t notice Holden’s until he was probably 4 months old, maybe older).
Is he just destined to get one regardless of our efforts? Do my kids come with unusually soft heads that mold to every surface no matter how little time they spend on it?
In no way am I suggesting to put your baby to sleep on their tummy- I am just telling you to BEWARE! There are so many things to stress out about when it comes to having a new baby in the house that their poor little head is the last thing you think about. Most of the time it’s “OMG stop screaming! Just sit in your bouncy chair!” and it doesn’t cross your mind that they’re always resting on the same side of their head.. but it happens, and it’s BAD!
I’m stressing out just thinking about it right now. I almost want to go in to make sure Parker is NOT on that side of his head but I fear waking him up and the absolute havoc that would wreak in this house.
If you like to be constantly criticized over your peanut butter to jelly ratio on sandwiches, being a parent is definitely for you.
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