Just more proof that babies, toddlers & children are all evil.
My days are spent dealing with a screaming baby and an unruly 2 year old. No, Holden’s not that bad- but he DEFINITELY has his moments, and he loves to test every single boundary I set over and over again.
Friends who have volunteered to watch either or both of the boys must have nightmares about what the day will be like from everything they hear about what I go through on a daily basis.
… And all of these friends probably think i’m completely exaggerating and/or totally insane.
Every single time someone else watches the kids- they are perfect angels. The best behaved children you’d ever meet!
I never let people watch Holden often so I was really freaked out about how he’d act around someone else for DAYS while I was in the hospital birthing his little brother.
Much to my surprise, he was perfect. He helped out, was sweet to my friend’s daughter, didn’t crap on the floor or piss his pants, went down for a nap for the first time by himself- all kinds of wonderful things.
Don’t get me wrong- I am VERY happy that he is so good for other people. I’ve heard horror stories from friends about babysitting toddlers and how god awful they are, so you can imagine what a relief it is to hear that my evil child will never be the subject of one of those stories.
At the same time… Totally pisses me off. Why can’t he be that good for me??? Why do I get the shit end of the stick? Child thoroughly enjoys giving me a hard time.
Here’s the thing though: it’s not just friends they’re well behaved for, it’s Thomas too!
Here I was today, all excited to go to my hair appointment- not only to get all pretty and to get the hell out of the house for once.. but so that Thomas would finally get a taste of the hell I go through on a daily basis (my sadist side came out, hoping Parker would scream the whole time and Holden would get into all kinds of crazy things)… only to hear that Parker was sitting happily by himself for over an hour and Holden played quietly while Thomas cleaned the house. What the hell?? He had a fantastic time! Not fair at all!
Either the kids hate me, or they love me so much that they refuse to leave me alone, ever. Mommy mommy mommy, all the time. Grrr.
Hard pass from me pic.twitter.com/VayvW1eopK
I've gotten to the point where I'd let my kids summon a demon with a Ouija board before I'd let them play Monopoly together again.
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WHY WOULD I LIE pic.twitter.com/kEmQYtl1mi