There is no age restriction on who can and can not enter places like Toys’R’Us, but I swear there should be.
Children above the age of 6 months and under the age of 5 just shouldn’t be allowed in at all. Not because I can’t stand the incessant whining that echoes throughout the isles (i’m far too used to hearing that for it to bother me anymore), but because it would save parents of children within that bracket a lot of hell.
Once a kid is above 6 months old, they want everything they can touch. And it only gets worse once they pass the one year mark and actually understand that they’re surrounded by magical goodies that they can play with.
It definitely does not help that Toys’R’Us recognizes this fact and capitalizes on it by hanging things from the ends of the isles so that no matter where your cart happens to sit, there’s something within the short stubby reach of small children.. so sticky little hands do exactly what parents don’t want them to- grab, pull, take.
Cue the inevitable mega-meltdown hissy-fit when you notice your kid has gotten their sneaky little hands on new toy you definitely hadn’t planned on purchasing and you quickly take it away from them. I do not know a single parent that this unfortunate situation has not happened to.
I refuse to be the type of parent who gives in and buys my kid whatever the hell he wants just because he’s screaming bloody murder for it. Noooo way. That leads to incredibly spoiled little brats with an intense sense of entitlement to everything that isn’t theirs. Pass! Though I can admit it is a tempting thing to do just to make the screaming stop. Holden has more toys than he could ever dream of playing with, he definitely doesn’t need some new random ass trinket that he’ll more than likely get bored of in five minutes that will rape my wallet of 20 precious dollars.
So on any normal day? I let him scream and ignore him. Today was not a normal day. We were actually in Toys’R’Us to not only get a gift for someone else, but to spend a gift card that was given to him at my baby shower.
Hard to decide what to get him to stop the screaming when he’s screaming about EVERYTHING dangling off those stupid little racks within his arm span on every single isle.
We found a very very annoying little talking Elmo ‘doll’ (not that he watches Sesame Street but he has plenty of books containing the characters and is somehow drawn to creepytastic Elmo), and put it directly in his hands.
“MO! MO!” the screaming stopped. I can see why parents use this tactic. My only hope is that he doesn’t think that because it happened once that it will happen again, ’cause it isn’t gonna.
Why should children be allowed back in toy stores once they’re five?
Threats are a hell of a lot easier to use at that age.
The “Are You Ready to Have Kids?” Checklist of Doom goo.gl/fb/DTPJ1A
If anyone asks how I died, you can just go ahead and tell them "she was lured in by free pie in exchange for listening to 2nd graders screech Thanksgiving songs for 30 minutes"
Half-Assed Jingler Syndrome goo.gl/fb/McWfBy
@ItsEvieClaire Booze and tears
I'm not saying this is the perfect #Christmas gift for all the parents in your life, but.... okay, yeah I am. That's exactly what I'm saying. Truths from the bowels of parenthood! amazon.com/Kids-Are-Turds…
@Gofashiondeals All of that and more. Good times. Gooooood times