Umm.. say what? I love advice that makes no sense.
I’ll try not to be induced when someone invents something to keep me from having hypertension during pregnancy.
As if induction is something I would have chosen- or as if I would have chosen to be forced to lay on my left side the ENTIRE time I was in the hospital, or continue to be on bed rest even after I gave birth- cause that was AWESOME let me tell you! So much fun not to be able to get out of bed! And that Magnesium they had me on- Oh my God! BEST SHIT EVER! THe migraines and nausea that came along with it were super duper fun!
Come on now, if I could NOT be induced, I wouldn’t be. How many times have I said that I hated being induced, and that pitocin is the devil?
Childbirth isn’t cut & dry. It isn’t simple for everyone. Not everyone can have their water break, go to the hospital, and painlessly deliver a child in a handful of hours. Some people have health issues, some people have to have a c-section for all sorts of different reasons, some women labor for 2 freakin’ days. I wish it were easier, I wish my health would cooperate but there are NO guarantees with pregnancy & childbirth.
As Forrest Gump would put it (if he were talking about shooting a crotch rocket)
“Childbirth is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get”
The “Are You Ready to Have Kids?” Checklist of Doom goo.gl/fb/DTPJ1A
If anyone asks how I died, you can just go ahead and tell them "she was lured in by free pie in exchange for listening to 2nd graders screech Thanksgiving songs for 30 minutes"
Half-Assed Jingler Syndrome goo.gl/fb/McWfBy
@ItsEvieClaire Booze and tears
I'm not saying this is the perfect #Christmas gift for all the parents in your life, but.... okay, yeah I am. That's exactly what I'm saying. Truths from the bowels of parenthood! amazon.com/Kids-Are-Turds…
@Gofashiondeals All of that and more. Good times. Gooooood times