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Excitement ensues?

There is definitely something in the water. Just like the year following Holden’s birth- EVERYONE seems to be pregnant these days.
Most of my friends who happen to be knocked up are ahead of me by many weeks, and all of them are either popping their kids out, or are on the verge of doing so- and suddenly I find myself thinking “when will it be MY turn?”… I almost want to call it jealousy.

This entire pregnancy I have been waiting and waiting to get excited about my new baby and it just hasn’t been happening as fast as i’d like- and I think it’s just as crappy as all the naysayers do. You can’t force the feeling of excitement though, it is something that can only come naturally. Here and there i’ve felt pangs of ‘YAY!’, like when i’m shopping for baby clothes for him, or thinking about actually getting to SEE him- but for the most part the pregnancy has been full of ambivalence.

I expected a gradual increase in excitement- so these weird thoughts of ‘is it october yet?’ are surprising to say the least… and only half of that feeling is because I strongly dislike being pregnant and am already pretty miserable due to my stupid uterus and all of its’ issues.

Perhaps a lot of the sudden enthusiasm has to do with the baby shower being back on- thanks to a friend of mine who swooped in and saved the day and is taking the reins. Now it’s not just me being excited, it’s the people around me finally becoming excited as well.. because there was a lot of negativity about this pregnancy in the beginning, and NOT just coming from me. The tides are finally changing and it might just be my perception- but it seems as though there’s a lot more positivity coming my way lately, which definitely helps to change my general feeling about the whole thing.
Who knows, maybe soon i’ll be one of those annoyingly happy pregnant women you wish you could just kick in the shin because you wish you felt as awesome as them?
Annoyingly happy would be a nice change.. maybe not a good one for the blog because then i’ll be shitting rainbows and butterflies- but i’m sure I can find other things to make fun of for the sake of saving the funny. I do have one of the weirdest children on the face of the earth, shouldn’t be hard to do.

I know one thing for sure- I am not trying to rush this pregnancy along, no matter how many twangs of jealousy I happen to get! Baby better not come ANY earlier than October, no matter how much I complain about braxton hicks, swollen feet and bad skin (and those are only the beginning of the nasty side effects. Just you wait).

Posted on June 17, 2009 by Holdin' Holden 4 Comments
Holdin' Holden

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4 Comments

  • I’ve been having a hard time getting excited about this pregnancy too. It’s probably the fact that they were unexpected ones. Those are always hard to get used to. It really wasn’t until I hit like 35 weeks that I started getting excited and once I hit 37 I all the sudden started getting really antsy and wishing he would just hurry up and come, lol.

  • Glad i’m not alone! Although I do have to admit I was downright PISSED and completely unhappy about it in the beginning. Definitely not UNhappy about it anymore, so that’s a good thing..
    i’m thinking maybe after the next 4d ultrasound where I REALLY get to see what he looks like i’ll get pumped. Not pumped to blow out my vajay again, but just pumped that he’s coming and ain’t no one stoppin’ him

  • hey I still have to suffer here, Idk how far along I am yet (wont know until Friday) and am miserable already. Having Braxton Hicks contractions already and the complete lack of energy is killing me. Oh btw I need your address so I can send/ship something for Holden and the new baby. You can myspace me the message 😛

  • Once that baby fever starts to kick in, even though you’re still growing him, it’s the best feeling. I’m trying really hard not to molest all of the baby clothes we have in the basement (I have other things to do before!) or set up the crib.