All throughout my pregnancy with Holden, I was told time and time again how ‘small’ he was measuring in ultrasounds. My due date even got moved back twice early on because of this.
The farther along you get in pregnancy the more inaccurate ultrasounds become. Something like up to a 2 pound difference. You’ll never really know how big your kid is until you try and push their ginormous head out of you and it gets stuck because.. oops! guess what? Baby is much bigger than had been anticipated.
This was definitely the case with Holden. A week before I gave birth, because I was under such strict monitoring, I was to have an ultrasound to make sure my fluids were ok and that my high blood pressure wasn’t negatively effecting him (they weren’t). During that ultrasound I was told Holden only weighed 5 lbs. This totally freaked me out. That’s a small baby. I knew I was being induced the next week so I was concerned that a small baby meant an underdeveloped one. Last thing in the world you want is to see your child be rushed off to the NICU as soon as you give birth because of decreased lung function or something equally as scary.
Of course, all fears were squealched once Holden came screaming into this world at 7lbs3oz and was perfectly healthy. he was also a week early, so he had potential to get even bigger than that.
Even knowing how inaccurate ultrasounds can be, because i’ve been throguh the experience first hand of them being so, this time around i’m having the total opposite freak out.
This baby is BIG. I’ve been told a bunch of different times, by a bunch of different ultrasound techs that this baby is big. Even when I had a egular appointment with my doctor (she does not sit in on the ultrasounds) she said “Well, he sure is a BIG BABY!”
Even by looking at the size of my stomach, and the power of his kicks and how early I was feeling them- I have a feeling he’s a large child.
Big babies scare the crap out of me. I had serious trouble just getting Holden out, and he was of average size. Not even the epidural could numb the pain of his big ol’ head trying to come out. I couldn’t even do it on my own (snip, snip, remember?).
How in the world am I going to push a kid out who could potentially be two pounds larger?
ME??? Pushing out a 9 lb baby??? Noooooo way! No way in hell. I don’t think that’s physically possible.
I fear the snip snip again and the god awful recovery time and not being able to sit comfortable for weeks. I fear tearing internally (which did not happen last time but I have heard horrible painful things about it). I fear big baby getting stuck and having to be cut out of my stomach.. that thought alone makes me lightheaded. C-Sections scare the living crap out of me. Both my brother and I were C-Sections, my brother an emergency, because from what I recall being told, he got stuck, and I was planned.. and The little my Dad has told me is pretty terrifying. It’s one thing to have a planned C-Section and know what you’re getting into, but to have baby go into fetal distress because they’re trapped in your too-small for their bulbous head birth canal and being rushed into a room and your husband isn’t allowed in and being sliced open and all that craziness… Not something I want, at all.
Could the ultrasounds be wrong? Of course they could. Maybe this kid is just hercules and that’s why he’s been beating the shit out of me so much earlier than Holden ever did. Maybe he’s just really LONG (long is not as bad as wide, trust me. Once those head and shoulders are out you’re golden). Maybe his growing will slow down early and he’s just getting it out of the way now.. Lots of maybes.
For now, I worry.. and hope for my va-jay’s sake (and for baby’s sake.. mega coneheads are freaky looking) that i’m able to at least somewhat easily be able to grunt and scream this kid out of me without the assistance of scary tools and cutting instruments.
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