Guilt: NOT better late than never

When I wrote a few days ago that I could eat comfort food without feeling guilty about it because there’s just nothing else I can chew on due to the stitches in my gums… I typed too soon.
The guilt for eating fatty starchy sugary foods is definitely kicking in now. I know it’s not exactly my fault, I didn’t ASK for wisdom teeth to grow in.. Didn’t ASK for the one to shatter and stab me in the cheek.. Certainly didn’t want them surgically removed. And let’s be totally honest about it- there just aren’t many healthy foods that go down without a lot of chewing.
Sure, there’s the soups with low sodium that taste like cardboard drowned in bland ass chicken stock- but there’s only so much of that you can eat before feeling like you’re go crazy… so to compensate for the taste you add about 15 crackers to at least make it somewhat enjoyable. There goes all the health in the dish right there.

Maybe if I could exercise the fact that i’m eating crap wouldn’t be so bad- but no WAY am I going to even attempt one single crunch and risk popping a stitch out. I want this entire ordeal over with all at once, as soon as possible. I can’t believe i’m saying this- but I actually MISS working out and eating healthy. I feel like such a bump on a log sitting around in a foggy daze all day with an icepack on my cheek.

TMI warning here: it also doesn’t help that I don’t think i’ve pooped ONCE since the surgery. The same thing happened after I had Holden, I think it took me at least a week to take a dump.. but that made sense considering where my stitches were and there was a LOT of fear to go along with trying to push a log out. My body must really miss super-fatty foods? Maybe it’s that i’m not smoking in fear of gum-cancer (if that’s even possible)? Smoking is definitely a natural laxitive, one I do not have the aid of right now. I’ve always said: one big poop and you’ll feel all better. Where’s my relief?

Anyways, enough of that. Today I finally took the initiative and cleared my closet OUT. There some some things I can’t bear to part with.. but I did pretty well being that I am a pack rat of the highest degree. I have finally come to terms with the fact that i’m just never going to be a size 2 again. Oh well.
4 bags full of clothes, and an entire bag of shoes (large trash bags to be exact).
There’s a new consignment shop in town that caters to the type of clothes and brands I have/wear, so it seemed like the perfect place to go. It took them an HOUR to sort through my crap, only to take 15 items. 15! Out of 5 bags! I didn’t expect them to take everything, of course, some stuff has been sitting in my closet FOREVER (but still in good condition), I certainly expected them to take more than they did. Oh well, they paid me $60.00, and that’s more than I had before I went in there.
The rest of the clothes i’m going to try to get rid of on Freecycle (google it, it’s pretty awesome), and hope that someone just comes and takes it all off of my hands so I don’t have to look at it anymore. Maybe now Thomas will actually have room to put his clothes in our bedroom closet instead of the one in Holden’s room, hah!
As much as i’d like to sell them on Ebay, if I can’t get a consignment shop to take them, I doubt someone on Ebay would.. Seems like a huge hassle just to have fall through.

Well, that’s my day. I’m going to once again attempt to have a drink. Didn’t go so well last night- gave up half way through and popped a pain killer and went to bed like the wimp I am.

Posted on December 13, 2008 by Holdin' Holden 1 Comment
Holdin' Holden

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1 Comment

  • You sem to be mustering up the courage to drink. You have downed about 1.5 of them so far tonight.

    That does suck that you haven’t poopered in a couple days, I know how cranky Holden gets when he can’t get that poop out. DONT MAKE ME GET THE VASELINE ON YOU. Hopefully, it will come soon fo you.

    I was kind of irritated at that place today. I wanted them to take atleast half, if not more, get a good $150 – 200 for our trouble. Boo on them!