Out of all of my friends, I was the first to pop out a baby. I’m a little older.. but in this area age means nothing when it comes to bearing a child. I’m already getting off topic.. ANYWAYS
More and more, people are getting knocked up and popping out little ones all over the place (most I do not approve of, but whatever).
As this happens, I hear one line more and more:
“You are the only one who doesn’t sugar coat motherhood”
I suppose all these other girls are running around saying how fabulous and fantastic and picture perfect motherhood is. That they have ZERO complaints, couldn’t be happier- life is all rainbows and butterflies.
Uh-huh.. and I poop rainbow sherbet.
When I talk about motherhood, I leave nothing out. I don’t try and pretend that EVERY day is fantastic because let’s face it- it’s not.
yes, children are beautiful fantastic blessings.. but that doesn’t mean they aren’t frustrating balls of brattiness some days (if not most days). Anyone who tells you that their child isn’t frustrating and/or irritating is a huge liar.
Maybe it would make them feel guilty for saying their kid is annoying? Who knows. I don’t feel bad for one second for telling people that Holden can be the biggest turd on the face of the earth.
Why? because it’s the truth. He’s a one year old, it’s his JOB to be evil and bratty and whiny.
Now I don’t wonder why people go into parenthood thinking it’s going to be a piece of cake- because everyone they’ve spoken to about it sugar-coated it sooo thick that they think it’s going to be the easiest thing EVER.
HAH, good luck with that notion.
I’m sure some people probably think i’m a terrible mother for speaking so openly about my child.. and to them I say: KISS MY ASS!
I could care less about what people think of my parenting skills. My kid is going to be intelligent, well adjusted and won’t put up with any B.S.
There is nothing wrong with being honest. Look at all the teen mothers- some of them could have USED some honesty, don’t you think??
The “Are You Ready to Have Kids?” Checklist of Doom goo.gl/fb/DTPJ1A
If anyone asks how I died, you can just go ahead and tell them "she was lured in by free pie in exchange for listening to 2nd graders screech Thanksgiving songs for 30 minutes"
Half-Assed Jingler Syndrome goo.gl/fb/McWfBy
@ItsEvieClaire Booze and tears
I'm not saying this is the perfect #Christmas gift for all the parents in your life, but.... okay, yeah I am. That's exactly what I'm saying. Truths from the bowels of parenthood! amazon.com/Kids-Are-Turds…
@Gofashiondeals All of that and more. Good times. Gooooood times